[This is becoming both progressively more rude and more difficult. If anyone asks why his penmanship got shaky, he is going to tell them a seal did it. Which while not the strictest truth is also not a lie, and that means he can say it. Technicalities.]

Are you supposed to torment me this way? That doesn't seem quite right, somehow. It should be equal, a more fair distribution of agony.

[which is a sentence he definitely did not almost start writing down for his father to read. definitely. don't ask the answer is no (he did start writing it and got as far as It should be e, at which point he managed to turn it into a very nice if mildly awkward platitude.

This is a good part of his job, don't wreck him.]

Yes, and if I could be done with it, I'd worry no more.