stardustly | general open post

[ he was doing an excellent job. neve felt alight, all over, and that groan from kai didn't help matters in the least. he pressed close to him, between kai's legs, that hand burying further beneath his shirt until his wrist caught in it. his hand was splayed flat, touching as much of kai's chest as possible.

and his kiss was hungry. he didn't stop to think if it was too much, only kissed kai, only caught his bottom lip between his own, then grazed it with his teeth, then tilted his head just right. so the kiss was deeper. so his tongue touched kai's. so he could taste him, and remember how that was for the first time forever.

his hand left kai's shirt only to find his leg, palm fitting against the side of his thigh almost possessively. he guided kai's leg so he would wrap it around his waist. this way they could be closer, because right now, that's all neve wanted. ]

[ There were so many thoughts going through his mind but he couldn't really grab onto one long enough to actually explore it. The desire and yearning were his sole focus at the moment and finding a way to have more of Neve. The sheer amount of want consumed him and he had never experienced such a need to be with someone before.

No wonder people became addicted to being with someone. He understood it all too well now.

Running his hands over Neve, he pushed closer as his tongue tangled with his. Maybe later he could taste Neve another way.

Squeezing his hip when Neve grabbed onto his leg, he moved upwards with a little more effort. The desire pooling so thickly in his stomach and he couldn't imagine stopping now. He only wanted more.

His lips trailed over Neve's neck, sucking a mark. ]

Neve. [ A whispered plea. Please, more. Please, don't stop. ]

Edited 2018-01-31 03:14 (UTC)

[ it was incredible to feel this like this. it was like nothing he'd experienced before. kai was whispering his name like a plea and he could taste him on his lips and he wondered how his skin would taste and how the hardness between them would feel on his tongue and what kind of noises kai might make.

he'd never been this turned on by anyone before. he wanted to be closer still. he wanted nothing between them. he wanted to feel a connection between them that could only be shared this way.

as pleasure rose in his stomach with each movement of their hips, it was harder and harder to hold onto logical thought. more and more difficult to think of where he could lead this, and easier and easier to simply melt into this. here and now. like this. grinding against each other still in pjs in the early morning. letting out a loud gasp at being marked again, heat shooting down his spine.

he moved with more intent than ever. each roll of his hips was precise and aimed to make them both feel good as he pressed his heated face against kai's neck. his face was flushed due to pleasure and heat more than embarrassment, but it felt amazing to hide it in kai's neck, to take a sharp intake of breath and smell him. he was letting out noises himself, little choked sounds muffled against kai's skin, keeping his leg hitched over his hip, grip tight. his body tensed, but he held off, just a little more. and eased back to look at kai, because if he was going to wait until kai came first, he wanted to see it. ]

[ Heat crashed over him in waves upon waves, a feeling he never experienced on land as he often indulged in the sea. It pulled him closer to Neve, their bodies shifting and caressing like a boat in the swells of the ocean tides. Each zing of pleasure brought him closer to the edge and he knew it wouldn't be much longer before he slipped beneath and right into the desire swirling around him. Something he had never experienced to the extent he currently felt with Neve.

Everything focused on him at the moment - the way he felt, his touch and taste, along with all the noises he kept making. It undid him and he couldn't help moving his hands everywhere, nails digging into Neve's back and shoulders without conscious thought of doing it.

And with a few more perfectly timed thrusts and snaps of his hips, he fell over the edge with a whimper of Neve's name and his back arched up. His vision down right blurred as he fell back onto the mattress, chest heaving.

Wow.

Really wow.

Cracking open his eyes, his body continued to tremble but he quickly ran his hands down to try and help Neve reach his release too. ]

Come, Neve. Wanna feel it.

[ he almost wished kai had been naked. almost. the sight of kai letting go like this was breathtaking enough as is, punching the air out of neve's lungs and making his movements falter, but his grip on him tighten.

it was hearing kai's request that undid him. his voice, asking him to follow suite. his voice saying he wanted to feel it.

he felt cared about. thought of. this wasn't a quick using each other to get off situation, it wasn't something where they would fall on separate sides of the bed in the after math then never speak again.

normally he would have hidden his face from kai before letting go, but he didn't even have time to consider it. his orgasm hit him in a rush, body shuddering above kai and letting out a sharp breath and a whine. the force of it was enough that it was all he could do, and as wave after wave of pleasure rushed through him he felt himself grow boneless.

his arm gave in, and neve fell boneless over kai, foreheads bumping together on accident. ]

Shit. Sorry — [ he was still panting and his heart was racing but he was reaching for kai's face to look at him and make sure he wan't hurt. ]

[ Throughout his life, there were plenty of beautiful sights his eyes had witnessed but none of them compared to the sheer beauty of Neve finally letting go completely and letting him in. His eyes widened just a little as he watched Neve's release, another kind of warmth spreading throughout him. With each hitch or vulnerability running along Neve, he only wanted to protect him more, to keep him safe from the nightmares of his past. There were plenty and far too many he did not know about but wanted to.

He wanted to know everything about Neve, wanted to settle along the broken shatters with something lighter and brighter. To prove to Neve life could be so much more if only he took they chance.

While he didnt expect Neve to fall on him, so overcome with pleasure, he only laughed in return, nuzzling at the fae's neck. ]

I like you right where you are. Don't move yet. [ They would need to clean up but for the time being he kissed along Neve's neck to ease him through the pleasure still rushing through him, hands softly running along his hair. Complete tenderness and adoration. ]

Embarrassing, [ he mutters, but he doesn't want move. kai said he liked him here. so neve stays, burrowing against him. it's a bit messing, but he's never cared much about that when it came to sex. besides, kai is... warm. and what he's doing right now, kissing along his neck, running his hands through his hair... it's so good, an aftershock of pleasure makes him shiver.

for now he's still entirely caught up in this to think too much. for now he lets himself enjoy the affection, the tenderness. he soaks it up like a sponge. he's been missing it, for so long. wondering what it would be like to finally give in and let someone into his life, let someone touch him and hold him.

it's a lot. he lies still, quiet, breathing in soft and slow, for a while. ]

[ Peace wrapped around them and drifted everything else away, which felt really nice on Kai's end. He did not often have the time to relax and unwind when there were so many things to take care of in his life. But it felt nice to just focus on Neve and allow his mind to rest. His lips continued their paths along his skin, biting and marking here and there in a burst of slight possessiveness. How attached he felt to Neve would probably be a problem and he knew he shouldn't but he could not help it.

Neve captured him from the very first second. ]

Why embarrassed? [ He asked in a murmur, trying and nearly failing to not press up into Neve's body. It just felt so good and how could he not want more? Want everything? ]

I couldn't hold myself up... [ which seems silly, but makes neve feel flustered. he usually likes being more in control than this.

but also doesn't usually do this. not with someone he's begun to have a strong attachment to. not with someone he doesn't intend to shoo out of his bed as soon as he feels he can breathe normally again. which, apparently, is somewhat impossible with kai's hands and lips on him. he keeps his eyes closed, fighting off the thoughts threatening to break the dam. just another minute, or two, or three. they've come this far, a few minutes more won't hurt, right?

it's been so long since he's been held. and he's never really been held, not like this.

he knows it won't — can't last. ]

I should clean us up, [ he says after a moment, breathing out and lifting himself on his elbow. ] I can do it with magic.

[ The confession earned a wide smile and a slight ducking of his head in case Neve didn't understand the look. He never wanted to upset him, especially after he learned how sensitive Neve actually could be. The tough act being just that but Kai understood all about having secrets and skeletons in your closet. ]

I thought it was - really sexy.

[ A light blush dusted his cheeks and he pulled back when Neve continued on about getting cleaned up. Moment over, right? He actually should have anticipated being an one and done kind of thing but it still twisted something inside of him. ]

Oh. Okay. That would be - great. Magic away.

[ He offered a smile, pushing up some to be able to sit up, nose drink long at the drying come on his body. They really should have removed clothes first. ]

Thanks for letting me stay, Neve.

[ he gave kai a small smile, but the more seconds tick away the more unsure neve feels about... well, everything. kai looks good right now, flustered and a bit of a wreck, marks on his neck. he wants to treasure that image, because it's a forbidden one he was not meant to see in the first place.

he'd trespassed onto something. ]

No problem. [ he touched kai's arm, letting out just enough magic that he surely felt it over his skin. the sticky mess left behind was gone the second it faded. ]

You want something to eat? [ it was maybe not obvious, but the crack in the door was slowly closing again. it hurt his heart, but he didn't know what else to do. he couldn't pull kai into his life so intricately. he would get hurt, or killed, and neve already hated the thought. ]

[ Something sank in his stomach at the look on Neve's face, a sour sort of churning happening there. It all gripped at his heart, so much so he barely noticed the cleaning or the words Neve asked him. Seriously, how could he even think of food at the moment when it felt like a caving in. Neve drifting from his fingertips to head back to shore.

And he knew Neve probably did not mean it but he felt used in a way. A cheap vessel for an one ended goal. Shifting back, he shook his head, fingers clenching and releasing a few times. He hadn't expected - well, he didn't know what he had expected but given he had never done anything sexual with someone before - the dismissal hadn't been in the rankings.

The exhaustion and stress from the past few days only made things worse, honestly. ]

I should - probably go. I've been here all night.

[ Ducking his head, he slipped from the bed, searching for his shirt and shoes. ]

[ instead of feeling relieved, neve just feels sad. he doesn't know how to deal with this. he doesn't want kai to go, nor would he want him to feel used. but the mere act of having let kai stay in his bed meant kai was tainted in a way, now. because the queen might find out. and maybe she'd make him a target.

even knowing that, what neve wants is to see kai a little longer. ]

You're not staying? [ his breathing hitches. he feels terrible enough about himself and about doing this when it puts kai in danger and now by clearly not knowing how to keep handling this situation he feels for a moment certain that he's about to have some sort of break down.

he curls the hand hidden from kai into a fist, digging his nails into his palm. ]

Kai... I'm sorry.

[ Emotions bouncing all over the place, Kai shoved his shirt on none too gently, only stopping in his pursuit from Neve's words. The fae continued to confuse him and leave him grasping for some kind of solid ground. Did he want him or did he want to shove him away? Neve could not have this both ways. ]

You want me to stay?

[ It really seemed like Neve wanted to push him on the way out. Pressing his lips together, he moved a little closer to the bed. ]

You don't have to be sorry, Neve. If you want me here, I can stay. If you want me to go - I can.

[ He wanted to stay, he really did. ]

I can make food if you want.

I want... [ he could feel his fingernails breaking skin. it would heal before kai noticed, but the sting made him grit his teeth and out with it. ]

I want you to stay. [ it was a small thing, but for neve it was a giant step. just admitting as much. it was the truth, though, and it seemed weird to be unable to say this after what had just happened between them. how could he do this with kai and then simply act like he didn't want him around? his previous actions said otherwise.

even if, in his head, a battle was going on. he chose to separate his heart and his mind for this. he wanted kai to stay a little longer, just this once. ]

Let's have breakfast.

[ His heart nearly stopped as he waited for Neve to answer one way or another, determining the entire path of what they could be and become. He wished he knew more of the thoughts going through Neve's head but already knew he couldn't just ask. Things were still forming between them and it would work out one way or another.

Starting with the here and now.

His breath came out in a rush, his shoulders slumping in relief. He wanted him to stay so it had - he had to mean something.

Nodding, he climbed back on the bed, daring to lean in and kiss him softly. ]

Maybe I can have you for dessert?

[ that was better. some of the tightness in his chest evaporated just to see kai like this again. this was good. it had to be, if kai was relaxing and coming closer again. pressing a kiss to his lips.

implying more to happen soon. maybe it would be simpler if neve could simply say this had mattered to him, but doing so felt like admitting kai was partt of this, part of his life. which meant facing possible consequences he didn't want to imagine. the queen would have too much fun.

but he pushed that aside, lips quirking into a smile instead. ]

Are you already thinking about round two?

Maybe and I might even let you join in.

[ A stupid joke, really, but he wanted to try and lighten the air and bring things back to how they were before. Neve cared, he had to, and Kai just couldn't understand why he pushed him away. It made things even more confusing but he'd try to roll with it, attempt to give Neve what he needed.

He just wanted to be what someone needed.

Sliding off the bed again, he stretched a little. ]

Last one to the kitchen has to do all the washing!

[ And he took off without even attempting to make it fair. Winning mattered too much. ]

Wh — Hey! [ he called after kai, perfectly eager to leave the emotionally charged moment behind. it was too much, really. he had to set it aside. for now kai could stay for breakfast, and they could play these games and tease each other and... try not to flirt too much and fail.

he got up speedily, dashing after kai to try and catch up to him in the kitchen.

which was ridiculous, because he could wash dishes with a wave of his hands, so he didn't really need to win.

but it was playful, and light, and he wanted to go back to that too for a while longer. ]

You cheated!

[ A very wide smile greeted Neve when he finally entered the kitchen, a happy dance following not long after. He just really couldn't help himself and wanted to continue to make things lighter around them before it all fell apart because know he knew it really would. Neve spent too much time catching and releasing him, eventually the latter would overtake the former.

Why did he stick around? He should have just stepped away and put things to rest but he couldn't. Even if it hurt, he wanted those smiles and laughter from Neve. ]

You call it cheating, I call it winning! Now, what do you like to eat for breakfast? This is very important and I will judge you.

[ kai was so cute. it only made this hurt more. how badly he wanted to be with him properly, how guilty he felt for allowing even this much closeness when he couldn't commit to him the way he deserved.

it would blow up in his face, eventually. he knew that.

but right now, they both wanted to just be with each other. ]

Oatmeal and fruits. [ deadpan. he's serious. ]

[ The answer earned a nose crinkle, soon followed by a short laugh. Far too fond, fringed with feelings he kept trying not to have. Because each time he reached out for Neve he only came up with thin air. ]

You're a grandpa breakfast type. Why am I even surprised? [ A light tease as he moved around the kitchen, trying to locate things. ]

I prefer eggs and toast. Buttery toast. Sometimes with noodles if I feel like making them.

Are you saying I act like a grandpa? [ is that why youre not surprised, kai??? he's... conflicted about this.

but helps kai find what he needs, pulling out eggs and a pan for him. ]

I have noodles sometimes. Or left over pizza. [ but usually keeps it light for breakfast, and thats his right, OK KAI?? ]

[ A soft laugh left his lips as he set the pan on the stove and began working on the eggs and toast. It felt playful and light between them, something he wanted to last but knew it wouldn't. Love never really worked, a lesson his parents taught him and others in his family's life. He just didn't have a lot of faith in happy endings even if he longed for one so badly.

Eyes flicking over towards Neve he leaned in to give him a kiss. ]

Do you prefer homemade oatmeal or the instant kind?

Homemade! [ he sounds almost petulant. please, kai, who do you think he is?

he likes watching kai in his kitchen like this, making himself breakfast. he starts taking out ingredients for his own, but doesn't really start... does kai want to make this for him? ]

I have all the stuff. I can cut up my fruit or something.

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